A Prank to Remember
by LuckyMoonProngs
Summary: One-shot Comedy. A start of term prank has some weird things happening to the residents of Hogwarts. Who will save the day? And just what in the world is going on?


Disclaimer - We own nothing of canon, merely anything original. We acknowledge ownership by JKR, etc. and mean no infringement on copyrights thereof.  
(This one-shot is not meant to be taken seriously! Have fun!)

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**A Prank To Remember**

_By 'Ponine and Zenn_

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Harry Potter sat at the Gryffindor table watching the sorting at the start of term feast. A wave of nostalgia washed over him as the hat commenced with its opening song. This year's was cheerful and spoke not of danger, but magic and wonder, much as it had when Harry himself was waiting in line. Voldemort had been vanquished three months ago, the Death Eaters rounded up, and life had moved on. Harry had been branded a hero, much to his immense dislike; and mercifully most of the people he cared for had been spared death. The world had moved on, and happiness had returned in all. 

"Granger, Winston!"

Harry jerked out of his thoughts as Hermione punched him sharply in the shoulder. Though his glare was furious, she ignored it in favour of gesturing towards the front. A small boy was walking up to the stool and the hat. His hair was a sandy brown like Hermione's, but was much less bushy. Harry recognized him from the summer, when Hermione's parents had finally brought him with them to Diagon Alley.

"It's my brother! Oh, this is so exciting! I wonder what house he'll be in. I hope its Gryffindor. I would just die if he's in Slytherin! Or Hufflepuff. Oh, that was mean. Anyway, I do hope he's with us, I could teach him so much. He could join us in the library! And . . ."

Abruptly she was cut off as Ron reached around and covered her mouth with his hand.

"You'll miss it if you don't shut up!"

Hermione smacked at his arm, but he didn't release her. Her eyes narrowing, she worked under his palm and bit down hard.

"OWWW!" Ron screamed, jerking his hand away and wiping it on his shirt.

"Gryffindors! Be quiet!" McGonagall shouted down the table, glaring at a now blushing redhead. Harry smirked at his friend, then turned back to the sorting.

"She started it." Ron stated, too quiet for anyone to hear.

"GRYFFINDOR!!!"

Hermione let out a most undignified yell as her younger brother ran towards them. Elbowing Ron in the ribs, garnering another pained squeak, she moved over for Winston to sit down. Quieting after a moment, the Gryffindors watched the rest of the sorting with no further incidents.

Dumbledore made his start of term speech, which was much longer than any one remembered other years' being. As most of the student body began grumbling, he finished with the announcement of the Head Boy and Girl.

"From Gryffindor, the Head Girl, I am pleased to announce, is Ms. Hermione Granger."

Most everyone cheered as Hermione attempted to not look too pleased with herself.

"And from Slytherin, the Head Boy is Mr. Draco Malfoy."

The hall fell silent, except for the cheering of the Slytherins, as the rest of the students were stunned by the appointment.

"How, how in the world," stuttered a confounded Ron, "did that, that Ferret get to be HEAD BOY?! The only reason he's not in Azkaban with his slimy git of a father is because he was a minor! You can't have a Death Eater in a position of power, Dumbledore's gone daft, he has!"

"Ron," Hermione said in an irritated tone, "be quiet. You know Malfoy wasn't a Death Eater. And don't speak ill of the headmaster."

"But this is insane! And just because Malfoy doesn't have the Dark Mark doesn't make him innocent!"

"Ron, leave it alone." Harry interrupted his best friends. His tone and set of his features successfully quieted them down.

The food appeared, a veritable feast with everything imaginable, and the students began to load their plates.

"So Winston," began Ginny, as she spooned a pile of mashed potatoes in front of her, "what do you think of the castle?"

"I think it is wonderful. Truly a magnificent building; the charms that are contained in the walls are staggering! I read about it all in _Hogwarts: A History_!"

Harry and Ron glanced at one another, stifling their sniggering. Hermione beamed proudly at Winston, apparently happy with his knowledge. Then the group began eating, chatting about various things. About halfway through, Winston glanced around the room and whistled a teasing tone, seemingly to himself. Hermione glanced at him, but before she could ask about it, a scream was heard across the Hall.

All heads turned to the Slytherin table as an incensed Draco Malfoy leapt from his seat and stood up. In place of his perfectly maintained robes, he now appeared to be in an American cowboy costume. Denim jeans, a blue plaid shirt, and a suede vest was strange enough on the aristocratic young man, but what stood out more was the red bandanna, black cowboy boots, and cream coloured ten gallon hat. Swung over his shoulder was a horse's bridle and around his waist hung a gun holster, complete with six-shooters.

Malfoy glanced around, "Wh't the de'vil is goin' on?" Slapping his hand over his mouth, his eyes widened considerably. Instead of his usual crisp tones, a Western accent had now taken over his voice.

The Hall rang with laughter as various people started pointing at the Slytherin.

"Who did this here thing?!" Malfoy demanded, then again shut his mouth as a new wave of giggles sounded.

Suddenly a new yell echoed, drawing attention to the Gryffindor table. Hermione jumped up, tripping over her seat and landing sprawled on the floor. Her brand new lace skirt flew up revealing bloomers before she forced it down and rose to her feet. Her glare was almost enough to quell the laughs, but not quite. Especially when her brother and two best friends were nearly rolling on the floor.

"Stop it, ya'll!" Hermione's mouth dropped open upon realizing her voice had changed as well. Ron now did fall to the floor, doubled up as he laughed all the harder.

"Ron'ld Weas'ley, if ya donnot stop that!" She crossed her arms over her corseted chest. "Oh, damn i'tall!" With that the newly southern belle slumped back into her chair, then abruptly sat straight as the whalebone cut off her breathing.

More exclamations then resounded, as now three of the professors found themselves in startling outfits. Trelawney stood up and made for the door, humming Pomp and Circumstance instead of speaking as she attempted words. She was in a dark blue cap and gown, a blue and white tassel falling into her face, so the song wasn't entirely out of place.

McGonagall, on the other hand, didn't run, but instead stood and glared towards the house tables. "Who is responsible for this totally un-cool thing?!" Some of the students stared up at her incredulously, before succumbing once more to hysterics. Her language wasn't the only thing funny, as her voice fit to her costume as well. Instead of her stern robes and stanch hat, she now wore a cardigan over a button down blouse embroidered with a feline picture, cat earrings dangling from her ears, and as she moved from behind the head table, the students could see her pink dress. The style of a poodle skirt, it had an image of a cat on a leash.

"People, people, now. Peace. This is totally rad, dudes!" Albus Dumbledore sat back in his chair, grinning out at the Hall. As everyone turned to him, they were shocked to see his ruffled poet shirt he was now clothed in change in to bright shades of red and gold. After nearly blinding the ones nearest him, it than changed to green and silver. The other house colours soon followed, then abruptly mixed into a dizzying tie-dye. The headmaster of Hogwarts and leader of the disbanded Order of the Phoenix leaned back and propped his sandaled feet on the table, revealing equally sickening coloured bellbottoms.

The Great Hall fully erupted into chaos as more and more of those within were sent into character. Justin Finch-Fletchly was seen in a Cat in the Hat suit, spurting rhymes as he tried to figure out what was happening. Hagrid stayed in his chair, but no one could mistake his giant Teddy Bear suit, complete with fuzzy brown ears. And Filch was dressed as a businessman and was now attempting to sell cleaning products in a briefcase to random people, including Neville the baseball umpire, who kept shouting "Safe!" and "Out!".

Soon everyone seemed to be in random outfits, doing equally random things as their characters might. Ginny found herself standing on her bench, dancing in a Vegas Showgirl costume. Luckily for her, the sequined material did conceal all she didn't want shown. Padma and Parvati stood to the side, one crying as she clutched a teal teddy bear and a bottle, the other in an English Riding costume, flicking her riding crop at her sister to quiet her down. Near the head table, professors Sprout and Flitwick were humming the Wedding March in time with their walk, dressed in a white gown and black tux, respectively.

Seen in the milling people were a weatherman with his pointer, a Muggle policeman with a baton, a bar bouncer pushing others out of the way, a circus ringmaster, a dentist threatening people with a drill, and someone in a bathing suit hiding behind a person in a large singing plant suit from the Muggle musical Little Shop of Horrors. From another musical, a boy who may just have been Goyle, though it was hard to tell with the mask, was standing on a table loosening the screws of a chandelier, singing Angel of Music. Crabbe was seen in a green ogre outfit, which looked to Muggleborns like Shrek. Dribbling a ball between the tables, Ron ducked the other students, and tried to pull down the short pants of his basketball uniform to hide his legs.

Standing in the middle of the confusion, Harry glanced around and placed his hands on his hips.

"Now, calm down everyone. Never fear, rescue is imminent now I am here."

He turned slightly, allowing his blue cape to flow out. Glancing down, he smoothed the S on his suit and pulled at his tights. He walked over to a chair, stood on it, and raised his fist into the air. About to jump, he squeaked a little as a hand gripped his arm and yanked him down.

"You would be the one dressed like that insane poof from those Muggle things!" Severus Snape sneered down his nose at his student.

"Comic books, Snape. Honestly, teachers should have to take Muggle Studies." Harry muttered, then pulled his arm loose. "Now, as usual, I have to go rescue everyone, so . . ." Harry made to get back on the chair.

Then he stopped and turned back quickly, bumping into a scared second year student dressed as a flight attendant.

"The plane's crashing, the plane's crashing! I can't get Wingardium Leviosa to work! We're gonna die!"

Ignoring the girl, Harry stared at the Potions Master, completely stunned. He wasn't in robes, oh no, he was donning tight leather pants, a black turtle neck, and a leather jacket. His hair was pulled back in a ponytail, and on his hand he wore brass knuckles. All in all, a look he could pull off quite well.

"What in Krypton are you wearing?!" Harry asked, looking the man up and down.

Snape raised an eyebrow, raised his hand, and caressed the metal weapon.

"Something that is going to become quite useful if you do not fix this bloody mess!"

"Me?! I didn't have anything to do with this!"

Snape sneered and took a menacing step forward. Harry pushed his cape back from his shoulder and stood his ground. Before anything could happen, Winston ran up to them. Both Snape and Harry turned to him. As they did, Harry noticed that the first year was the only one still in robes. A suspicion came to him as he noticed the boy fidgeting guiltily.

"Winston, what exactly is going on?"

"Er, well, um, you see . . . Well, I kinda used a little something from, er, Fred and George Weasley."

Snape moved towards Winston, narrowing his eyes in anger. Harry flung out an arm to still him, putting his other on his hip once more.

"Winston, do you realize how dangerous something like this could be?"

Snape stared at Harry. "Really, it takes this to make the Boy-Who-Lived think rationally."

Ignoring his professor, Harry was about to go on when a loud bang stilled everyone's movements. Turning, he saw a broken chandelier covering a table. The masked phantom jumped off of it and ran for the door. Harry turned back to Winston.

"Is there a way to fix this, Winston?"

The boy nodded. "Sorry about this." Winston reached out and pinched Harry's arm sharply.

"Oww!" Harry exclaimed before realizing it didn't hurt.

Suddenly awakened, Harry sat up and tipped over on to the floor. The smell of perfume and incense assaulted his senses, and he blinked for a moment.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Harry muttered, shaking his head as he pushed upright. "Hermione doesn't even have a brother! Hell, that was insane."

Glancing around, he noticed everyone staring at him. Ron looked a mix of concerned and as though he thought his friend mental. Trelawney swept up to Harry, startling him and causing him to fall down on to his pouf, knocking against the table and unsettling their teacups.

"What is it, my dear boy? Death? Agony or anguish, perhaps? The power of my room can show so much. It was a vision, no doubt?"

Harry shook his head once more. "Merlin, I hope not."

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A/N: Thank you for reading and hope you liked the craziness!  
-Zenn and 'Ponine 


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